Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?

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In “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been”, Oates has described Connie's actions at the end of the story as an "unexpected gesture of heroism," a decision to sacrifice herself so that her family would remain unharmed. Some individuals may read the story as an anti-feminist allegory: Arnold Friend is Connie's punishment for having sexual feelings for boys. Others read the story as a feminist critique of a male-dominated society: the ending is essentially tragic, Connie's submission to Arnold Friend standing for the ways women are oppressed in a patriarchal society. Connie moves us because her situation speaks to our most urgent questions about identity, morality, and sexuality. On the other hand, Carver is trying to show the stereotype among women and men and how they react differently to tragic situations. In most cases the women are a lot more emotional about the tragedy and the men, basically try to be a man about it and just stays quiet but doesn’t really show any emotions to anyone. But after Howard and Ann leave the hospital they switch roles. Now Howard is the one that is very emotional and showing it and Ann is the one that is holding him. Throughout life in relationships this happens to many couples. Each person in the relationship has to be there for one another and help them through tragedy’s that occur throughout life and this is the message that Carver is trying to show us in “A Small, Good Thing”. Ann reacted to the accident very quietly and didn’t say much about anything. She just sat there and stared at her son, Scotty, waiting for him to wake up. She didn’t want to leave his side. Ann didn’t express any emotion to Howard until that moment and, as a result, it made Ann feel very happy being married to Howard because she knew that he is there for her. In Janus, Andrea learned that the bowl she was attached to was a present from a man in whom
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