It is impossible for them to trust anyone that easily because of the past experiences that they had. The destruction of trust between the children and their abuser is because of the incest that happened in the family. The family is the most important source and support to the child for their confidence and security. But because of the incest, the bond and trusts between parents and children are broken and the child cannot trust their own family. When the most important source; family betrayed them and cannot be trusted anymore, the child often feels that it is not possible to trust anyone in this world.
If I could change one thing in my community it would be to offer parenting classes. I listen to my friends complain about their relationship with their parents and the lack of communication between them often. What I have come to realize is that both parties don’t know that the relationship is broken and they need to change the way they are talking to each other because obviously it is not working. I believe that if parents knew different ways to talk and help their kids then more could get done in the relationship. It is hard raising kids and hurtful things can be said, but I just don’t think a parent should react in a hurtful manner.
In addition, survivor's may have trouble sleeping because of the trauma, anxiety or may directly be related to the experience they had as a child; children may be sexually abused in their own beds. Many survivors were betrayed by the very people they are dependent upon (family, teachers etc.) who cared for them, who insisted they loved them even while abusing them; learning to trust can be extremely difficult under these circumstances. Therefore, this is often the most difficult emotion for an adult survivor of childhood sexual abuse to get in touch with. For many survivors, these emotions are such a basic part of their day-to-day life that they don’t realist that there are alternatives.
Others work very hard to excel at every endeavour in an attempt to keep the family peace. Living with violence creates intense stress for a child. Within an abusive home, children often become silent victims. The abusive behaviour may not be directed at them but most children hear or witness the violence from one adult to another the effects of this can be life long and can have a profound effect. Domestic abuse can leave a child without a childhood.
There are many things in today’s society that go overlooked, and child abuse is one of those things. Child abuse, in my opinion is any mistreatment or neglect of a child that results in non-accidental injury, harm or death that cannot be logically explained. Some children go weeks, months, years being abused. They have no way out and are scared to confide in the people around them for
Parent illness and no other relative to take care of the child 5. Abusive relationships between parents 6. Parents using drugs There are lots of changes that the child or young person will experience when coming into care, their emotions and feelings will change, they feel upset and lonely and may feel they have done something wrong, they will feel confused and anxious and not understand why they have been taken away from their family and will not fully understand what is happening to them. It can be a very scary time for them meeting people they don’t know and their new surroundings, there are lots of people involved when a child or young person comes into care which will be very daunting for them especially for a younger child, an older child may not want to co-operate with the social workers or the foster carer’s which will be a very stressful time for all parties. It will take a very long time for a child or young person to be able to trust the carer’s and their family and be able to feel settled in their new home as they may feel like an outsider and do not belong here.
These are just three of many factors which can negatively affect children caught in between the divorce of two parents. The parental problems before a divorce have tremendous damaging power in children's lives. This is because divorce typically “crystallizes rather than creates long-standing family problems.”(Marriages and Families...p.476 Furstengber,Taitler) This means the problems in the family are made clear and have been occurring for the majority of the marriage. Parents in predivorce families are less involved in their children's education. (Sun,2001) This could be because the parents are so stressed out with the marital problems leading to their divorce that they neglect the academic needs of their children such as helping with homework and supporting their self confidence.
This causes kids to try to recreate “what was”. (DeBord, 1997, p.6) They will act like their parents never got a divorce, or they will try to get their parents back together. Kids do this because they feel at fault; they may believe something they did or said caused a parent to leave. All of these things happen to children during a divorce, it is a very hard thing for kids to cope with. The emotions in adolescents also suffer from divorce.
What this culture of narcissism does is convince many people to stray or want to stray away from their families, especially children at a young age like teenagers. Not to mention the increasing number of abuse and suffer within families, it is not a surprise that people are starting develop more anger and resentments towards their and other families. This is the main reason as to why Pipher believes that people only desire to fulfill their own immediate needs; it is because of people’s mistrust and hatred towards families that prevents people from feeling respect and empathy. Eventually, when people cannot find happiness within themselves or within other people because they cannot figure out how to properly interact, people lose in touch with their humanity. Once people lose in touch with their humanity, they fail to recognize the feelings that make them humans; they prevent themselves from recognizing their inner humanity.
His or her childhood was most likely difficult or even abusive and lacked love from their parents. This experience is mostly responsible that a person with Schizoid Personality Disorder is unable to love, or accept love from anyone. Cognitive theorists believe that it is more the way a person thinks, that his or her thoughts are empty and they are unable to gather other people’s emotions. The treatment for people with Schizoid Personality Disorder is rather difficult as he or she wants to avoid any social contact, making group therapy almost impossible. Still, sometimes when the person feels safe he or she might agree to attend one.