After spanking children, they will stop what they are doing at the time and will immediately obey their authority. However, a short time later the children will forget about their misbehavior, but the feeling of the abuse will still remain in their recollection. Psychological control is another way parents can punish their child. This method “uses guilt and the child’s gratitude toward the parent”(307). When this is being portrayed, parents may use signs of disappointment and sadness to control the child’s behavior, causing them feel guilt-ridden and upset for what they did.
Spanking is wrong Spanking is one of the most common forms of discipline used by parents. Although the very same parents do not condone hitting people, they believe spanking is a quick and effective technique for correcting unwanted behavior (Ramsburg 1). Ironically, by using violent and hurtful means of discipline, parents are instilling negative values in their children. The moral consequences of spanking children can have lifelong negative effects. For young children, parents are their primary role models.
Furthermore I will prove that this system is not efficient and can lead to further problems as children mature in age. My first premise is that physical rewards such as sweets, money and prizes do not alter a child’s behaviour. When used, the reward system only lasts for a short period of time until the child stops receiving these rewards (Grille, N.D). This is because when children are bribed with rewards for good behaviour, they soon learn how to manipulate adults so that they receive rewards in return (Grille, N.D). “On the other hand children also begin to believe that when they receive a reward for stopping an unacceptable behaviour, they should be given something when they treat people with respect” (Hall, 2009).
If parents correct their children, then the children learn right from wrong. Golden’s and Shaffer’s views that toy weapons present violence are alike because they share a similar attitude towards violence. The authors believe that it is wrong to let children play with toy weapons at such an early age. Toy weapons teach them that violence solves problems, and it is the parents’ responsibility to teach their children their values in regards to violence. Another view that Golden’s and Shaffer’s articles share relates toy weapons to death.
He advises the reader to learn the same skill sets early on in life so that they can take advantage of the opportunities in front of them. Twain makes fun of the parents’ false sense of control of their children. Twain explains how kids really act, and when they should obey their parents. He states “[always] obey your parents, when theyare present (291).Twain is not telling kids to disobey their parents. He is telling parents when their children are alone they don’t always follow the rules.
Smacking/Spanking of Children Should Not Be Banned A very debatable issue is if spanking children should be banned or not. Many people are on both sides. Some think that it is a form of discipline, and it will help the child to behave. Others think that it is a form of abuse, and if adults cannot hit adults, it should be illegal for adults to strike them. There is a difference, however, between punching your child in the face, and spanking him on the bottom when he is misbehaving.
If children do not trust people then the will mistrust them thus leading to personality problems and classroom problems. The second stage of Erikson’s personal development is Autonomy is pride in one’s self and when a person has pride in their self they can accomplish anything. Also in stage two if the child does not have autonomy they may develop low self-esteem and have an urge to manipulate his or herself. Children with autonomy still have pride in themselves when they fail because they have done all that they can do. As a parent and teacher we have to make sure that we push children to their limit and make sure that we award them too.
I am a firm believer that a short, sharp smack can keep children under control. This doesn’t mean they should be beaten up or even marked, but strict and fair punishment will benefit a child in the long run. Smacking or corporal punishment, as it commonly referred to, is both a contemporary and an emotive issue. The definition of corporal punishment according to Clark (2004) is ‘the infliction of physical pain on some offender for his offence’. This definition encapsulates smacking.
Spanking may stop the child then and there, but there’s a cost emotionally and cognitively to a child, and over the long run, it doesn’t usually lead to the child learning not to repeat the behavior that resulted in the spanking in the first place. It can also lead to the child learning to behave because of fear, not because of respect. (Cantu) Spanking a child results in them being afraid, and that hitting is the way you handle conflict. Instead, send a message to your child such as, “I love you and I can’t let you do that.” Children can learn best by mimicking their parents’ ability to control themselves, and parents can be models by using calm, firm and neutral discipline” (Cantu). Spanking is a form of abuse that people tend to turn a blind eye to.
Praise and Punishment: The Effects on Children -Jessica Broome We cannot teach children how to be successful adults by simply finding ways to make them obedient. When children do what they are told simply because they will either be rewarded or punished, they are being “obedient”. We want children to practice good behavior even when we are not there to offer a reward or dole out a punishment. As suggested by “insufficient punishment”, children will only change their behavior temporarily when the punishment is severe. This is also true of rewards.