Self Explanation Essay

1172 WordsApr 23, 20135 Pages
I hate these nights when I am trying to sleep and my brain argues and says “Hey!! Why don’t we think of things that have happened nine plus years ago and just dwell on them for a while?” And so it begins. On and on through the night hours my mind will march the images and flashbacks of old times behind my eyelids. Times that are long gone and things that I cannot change, but probably would if I had the ability to. This is like a lot of nights, my nightly routine -lying in the dark, reflecting on those times, memories swirling in my head as I stare into the inky blackness. I sigh. “It’s gonna be another one of those nights…” Let’s face facts. I believe we all have regrets, but I think mine run a little deeper trench than others. It seems, though, that some learn from those mistakes, and some, sadly, do not. I consider myself to be one of those lucky ones that did learn. It just took a little while. Since probably the 1960’s, we have all heard the rebellious young person’s slogan of “Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll”. Movies have been based on it, songs have been sung about it. It has been glamourized and contorted into a picture of a fun and fancy free lifestyle. But there’s also a dark side that we all have seen, heard, or read about. I experienced it for myself. I have played guitar all my life and always dreamed of becoming the next Joan Jett or Lita Ford. So during the brutally hot summer of 1998 in my tiny little town in rural Missouri, I had the brilliant idea to say “to hell with it” to my senior year. I wasn’t particularly fond of school anyways. So I took all the money I had saved and left my mother’s house. I packed up my few personal belongings, clothes, and guitar into my white Volkswagen Rabbit and went out into the world. “The world” was St. Louis. I was so in awe of this big city and immediately was

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