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Random Shit Essay

  • Submitted by: bringdaruckus
  • on April 4, 2012
  • Category: Arts and Music
  • Length: 751 words

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Below is an essay on "Random Shit" from Anti Essays, your source for research papers, essays, and term paper examples.

The cat is cuter than you ya ugly *******!!!

0 Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.

0 I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

0 I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather … Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

0 We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated.

0 I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

0 Don’t take life too seriously, you won’t get out alive.

0 You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

0 I don’t care, I don’t have to.

0 Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

0 I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

0 I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
- George Carlin

0 A synonym is a word you use when you can’t spell the word you first thought of.
- Burt Bacharach

0 If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
- Harry S. Truman

0 Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

0 When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

0 I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

0 I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

0 I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

0 Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

0 The word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’

0 The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Robert Bloch

0 You laugh because I'm different........... I laugh cause I just farted!

0 Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

0 What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?

0 He who laughs last didn't get it.

0 After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."

0 Always remember you're unique, just like...

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Random Shit. Anti Essays. Retrieved July 20, 2018, from the World Wide Web: https://www.antiessays.com/free-essays/Random-Shit-198701.html