Hadia Nouria Bendelhoum Dr. David Hinckley English- 1A 29 November 2011 Arranged Marriage Through Cultures To Westerners who put a lot of emphasis on love and marriage or “love before marriage,” love is the only thing you need to be happy. But for societies who believe that arranged marriages will last forever, love can take the back seat, for the time being at least. Arranged marriages make up vastly the higher percentage in human history, but have recently become unusual and morally questioned in the Western world. These types of marriages still occur within Western culture, but mostly within the immigrant communities. For some cultures, arranged marriages are viewed as a social and economic necessity, the terms of which are agreed upon by the families of the future bride and groom.
The Benefits of Arranged Marriage I. Attention Grabber The arranged marriage vs love marriage debate is one that will may never be resolved. What is an arranged marriage? Do you know what benefits you get from arranged marriage? In the past, almost all marriages were arranged however in these modern times, many are opting to break from tradition and instead pursue a love marriage.Age comes first and love later.These are some of the benefits of arranged marriage .
In western cultures divorce is more common and it’s acceptable for people to get married multiple times. However in non-western cultures divorce is frowned upon and is therefore much less common, which makes it appear that arranged marriages are better for long term relationships. A research study which involved using a questionnaire on people from different cultures to determine whether they felt happy in their relationship or not was performed. Using questionnaires is a cheap and easy way of gathering information for lots of people, however as western questionnaires were used we cannot be sure if the results for the non-western cultures are due to how those people actually felt or if its due to how the question can be answered as its culture bias. Also the participants could show social desirability if they are aware of what the investigators are looking for.
Finally the men didn’t think much of women for doing things that they could. Most men married women for their inheritance, childbirth, appearance, housekeeping and were expected to be married by their families. I think the suffragists campaigns were important but not as important as what happened during WW1. Source one shows Joyce’s opinion so it’s not a solid fact so it might not be reliable as she could be bias to the suffragists. But I believe that the suffragists did help women win the vote by showing they can do it in a calm and peaceful way.
Does Love Belong In Marriage? In the essay “The Radical Idea of Marrying for Love” the author, Stephanie Coontz, looks at the traditions of love in marriage across many different cultures throughout the years and compares them to the Western world’s idea of marrying for love. Historically there have been many different reasons for marriage though the main reason was not usually for love but instead political or economical gain for the family. In cultures like India, Greece, and China, love was actually considered a distraction, even a hazard, and not usually a desirable emotion in a marriage. The Chinese believed that love in a marriage could disrupt the loyalty that a man was supposed to have to his family above all else.
Diversity of traditional Marriage In “For Better, For Worse: Marriage Means Something Different Now,” Stephanie Coontz states that society has diverse from traditional marriage, values and the way people live, to transform into an open minded society. According to Coontz, marriage is no longer the main way in which societies regulate sexuality and parenting or organize the division of Labor between men and women. Coontz believes that the divorce revolution is just one aspect of the worldwide transformation of marriage. People gained the ability to say no to shotgun marriage, the humanitarian reform lowered the penalties for out of wed lock birth. Coontz emphasizes “marriage has been displaced from its pivotal position in personal and social life, and will not regain it short of Taliban-like counterrevolution.” I agree with Coontz about the change of traditional marriage improving our society.
In Non-western cultures, the group tends to be the primary unit of concern. These are collectivist cultures which lead to relationships that may have more to do with the concerns of the family or group (Moghaddam et al, 1993). Levine et al (1995) investigated love as a basis for marriage in 11 countries. Respondents were asked whether they would be willing to marry someone who had all the qualities they desire in a marriage partner but whom they did not love. The US respondents were reluctant to marry in the absence of love (only 14% might marry someone they didn’t love).
Charlotte does not desire love or happiness, but asks ‘only for a comfortable home’ (106), and believes that ‘happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance’ (18). Austen contrasts this conventional view of a sensible, convenient marriage with Elizabeth’s desire for love and harmony in a marriage. Elizabeth’s contrast to Charlotte is evident as early as chapter 6, where Charlotte speaks of Jane’s need to ‘secure’ Bingley, and once she does, there will be ‘leisure for falling in love’ (17). Charlotte’s belief that it is better to know little about someone before marriage and the idea that happiness in marriage is determined by ‘chance,’ is countered with Elizabeth’s view of love in marriage, who tells Charlotte that this advice ‘is not sound’ (18). Elizabeth refuses ‘to be treated as a commodity in the marriage market,
Love at first sight- Does it exsist??? Do I believe in love at first sight? Unfortunately no I don’t. There is scientific evidence stating that there is love at first sight but I just believe it is lust at first sight and not love. You cannot love a thing which you have no idea about, you may love there looks the way they walk and things like that but you can never actually love them properly, love grows over time of knowing the person and even though they act like the person on their outside they may not be the same person on the inside they may act all hard but actually on the inside they are a big softie who cry’s all the time.
"It will be impossible for us to visit him, if you do not go" (Pg. 4). Mrs Bennett and her daughters are keen to speak with Mr Bingley as he is an eligible bachelor. Female’s needed to marry in order to be taken care of since they could not own property, nor gain an education that would enable them to provide for themselves. As such many women married out of necessity rather than for love.