Luna Williams English 100 02/10/2014 Just Whom is This Divorce “Good” For? Divorce is a huge topic a lot of parents think about when they feel that there spouse is no longer compatible with them and also the fact that it’s not working out for reason only they will know. It may just be the fact that two people that were deeply in love just feel out of it because of no connection anymore. In the article “Just Whom Is This Divorce” Good” For? Written by Elizabeth Marquart talks about how divorce can cause children even from a good divorce go through it there selves when they get older, children also feel that they are to blame for their parents getting divorced and they lose all interest for other things, there is also a lot of controversy about which parent gets which day can just lead up to a huge custody battle for most.
Divorce is tragic on many levels and all too often the impact on children is more then just the shock of their parents living in two different places. Other then “deal breakers” which could have physical or psychological damage to a child, society needs to take another look at why they are getting
Insecurity can also mean fear of abandonment or fear of being replaced. Parents may also fear that questions or criticism will put their child at a disadvantage in school. However, in most cases, the provider is the secondary attachment for the child. Guilt is another emotion parents sometimes may feel because the parents are not there as much as they should be because of work or other obligations. Parents are often show frustration at not being there and being able to help their children in addition to not getting to see them as much as the teachers do.
Kids without parents suffer the most, there is no mutual agreement for what's best for the child. The mother would like to have things her way and the father his. They can't combine the sight of each other, even if it means sake of their child. This makes very hard for the child and for the school and for other facilities that has to accommodate for both parents separately. For example “in parent teacher conferences there are two copies of report cards, two of everything because the parents can't agree to share.” This is very sad.
They feel the need to because no one else will. That line of thought normally comes from having parents who constantly disapprove and ignore their children. They don’t feel like they can escape so some children turn to imaginary friends, others to bad behaviors, and others to self-love, or narcissism. A child being taken away from their parents does more to their mind than anyone can imagine. And children don’t know how to coop so they do the best the can.
The parents usually do not socialize with other parents because they usually receive negative comments towards their child. Parents who anti-socialize usually channel that aggression to their spouse which results in violent arguments. Schools as well as teachers are also responsible on placing kids with ADHD in an environment where they can perform their best. This is not to segregate the children but to place them in an environment where they can learn their best. Also, if the child does not perform at his/her best, it greatly reduces the self-esteem not only of the child but the parents as well.
If a child experiences an event in his life such as a death or a serious illness, he will often find it very difficult to feel in control of his emotions. Many children will be profoundly affected by their parents separating or divorcing. The child will probably be very attached to both adults and will possibly be put under pressure to choose which parent, in their eyes, they love the most. A child in a situation of family break-up will often find trust very difficult to re-form. Occasionally, children will hear stories about “...what dad did...” or “...what mum said...” These situations could make the child appear to be distant or aloof from the outside and that they are indifferent to events.
The reason that spanking confuses them is simply this; parents are the example of the difference between right and wrong and all spanking is doing is telling the child is that every time somebody does something wrong they should be smacked for the mistake they made. Secondly, spanking simply installs a sense of "fear and resentment" towards the parent. The only result that comes from making a child fear the parent is just reverse what is trying to be accomplished; discipline. On top of fearing the parent, the child will also lose respect for their parent and make the relationship between parent and child become very weak. Discipline will not work if parents do not have a good relationship with their child This highlights how spanking a child will weaken the respect that is needed between child and parent.
Therefore, according to the latest studies of some organizations such as children protection, spanking can create physiological problems such as depression in a child. It makes parents believe that spanking children can harm their children. Spanking children is not a good way to discipline them because children can get some mental problems. For example, children who are usually spanked by their parents believe that they hate them, so children get depression because of spanking. Children can also get mental problems because of spanking such as killing themselves.
Some children even believe they are the cause of the turmoil going on between the parents. This bitterness leads to feelings of self-loathing and thinking that the world would be a much better place if they were never born. Such children often suffer from developmental regression and inability to form social relationships with peers, parents, teacher or