Intimacy And The Therapeutic Process

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Intimacy and the Therapeutic Process “No matter that the patient’s relationship to the therapist is ‘temporary’, the experience of intimacy is permanent, it can never be taken away” (Yalom, 1980, p.406). Introduction Very often clients come to therapy seeking connection and some sort of meaning to their life, they feel lost, as if something is missing within them. I believe this sense of ‘emptiness’ is a desire for intimacy, not just with another but ultimately with themselves, therefore the therapeutic relationship becomes the container for growth, exploration, and self- discovery. And although the relationship will come to an end, the intimacy experienced within the therapeutic process will be internalized by the client and hence become their new frame of reference for their interpersonal relationships. In this essay I will give a brief outline of what intimacy is, I will then look at some of the relevant theories in developmental psychology and discuss how they apply to me both personally and as a therapist. I will weave between theory and my own experience throughout this essay. What is intimacy? Intimacy can best be described as a multi component phenomenon, which is a process rather than an event, its main characteristics are reciprocal self disclosure and understanding, caring and affection and a deep level of acceptance. The process of building intimate relationships involves taking risks and revealing oneself to the other, when risks are taken and acceptance is received, trust is built and so the relationship deepens. Yalom describes it beautifully.... ”The more you can be truly yourself, can share yourself fully, the deeper and more sustaining the friendship. In the presence of such intimacy, all words, all modes of comfort, and all ideas take on greater meaning” (Yalom, 2009, p. 131). Intimacy is a primary human need, it’s not something that is
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