Human Jealousy Essay

503 Words3 Pages
Jealousy in a Relationship Jealousy has been defined as an aversive emotional reaction evoked by a real or imagined relationship involving one’s partner and a third person. Many people think that a jealousy is a measure of devotion and that the absence of jealous feelings implies a lack of love. Jealousy is related more too injured pride, or to people’s fear of losing what they want to control or possess, than to love. We often rely on our partner to validate our positive sense of self. So we feel threatened and a sense of potential loss of both reciprocity and a positive self-image if we perceive that our partner is considering a replacement for us. The green-eyed monster, as Shakespeare called it, can camp in your head at any time during a relationship: when you are madly in love, when you are snugly attached, even when you dislike your partner. Neither gender is routinely more jealous—although women are more willing to work to win back a lover, while men tend to flaunt their money and status and are more likely to walk out to protect their self-esteem or save face. And it's true that people who feel inadequate, insecure, or overly dependent tend to be more jealous than others. But the "monster" actually evolved for positive reasons. Throughout our primordial past it discouraged desertion by a mate, bolstering the family unit and enabling the survival of the young. At the same time, it has pushed us to abandon philanderers—and many a futile match—in favor of more stable and rewarding partnerships. Jealousy can even be good for love. One partner may feel secretly flattered when the other is mildly jealous. And catching someone flirting with your beloved can spark the kind of lust and romance that reignites a relationship. Jealousy is just a sick feeling of insecurity of losing the one you care for to another. Seems to play games nonstop in your head and
Open Document