How Business Works Essay

2021 Words9 Pages
**************************************************************************** Smarthinking's E-structor Response Form (Your marked-up essay is below this form.) HOW THIS WORKS: Your e-structor has written overview comments about your essay in the form below. Your e-structor has also embedded comments [in bold and in brackets] throughout your essay. Thank you for choosing Smarthinking's OWL; best wishes with revising your paper! *Strengths of the essay: Hello, Carisa! My name is Luke M., and I am happy to be your tutor this evening. Thank you for sharing your essay with me. I hope you find my suggestions below helpful as you revise your paper. I think you are off to a great start with your thesis, Carisa: An entrepreneur should have a successful business plan, show integrity, and have good leadership abilities. Your thesis should do two things. First, it should express your point of view. Second, it should introduce your discussion points, or reasons for the view. You have both here. Nice work! *Carisa 5794614 has requested that you respond to the Organization: Carisa, I think your argument could be helped as well by better organization and development of your paragraphs. Each of your paragraphs should focus on a single idea. Ultimately there are four parts to a paragraph: 1. Your main idea or claim expressed in a topic sentence. What is it you want to argue or discuss in this paragraph? 2. Provide support or evidence for your idea. Here you can use a quote or an example. 3. A sentence or two of explanation, tying together your evidence and your claim. Explain to your reader exactly how you have proven what you set out to prove. 4. Transition into the next paragraph. You have some long paragraphs here. Once you have achieved these four parts of a paragraph, and are moving on to a new idea (even a subtle change), transition into a new

More about How Business Works Essay

Open Document