Gone But Not Forgotten Lily Owen Character Analysis

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Gone but Not Forgotten Losing someone or something you love or care deeply about is very painful. A person may experience all kinds of difficult emotions and it may feel like the pain and sadness that they are experiencing will never let up. These are normal reactions to a significant loss. But while there is no right or wrong way to grieve, there are healthy ways to cope with the pain that, in time, can be renewed and help someone move on. Dealing with this pain can cause a person to become stronger or unfortunately can affect them negatively. The characters in both Katie Crouch’s Men and Dogs and Sue Monk Kidd’s The Secret Life of Bees have to deal with the difficult process of moving on from a loved one’s death. Lily Owens,…show more content…
While living with her abusive father who she chooses to only call T. Ray, Lily feels that she is lacking certain femininity in her life. She battles with her hair which was “constantly going off in eleven different directions” (Kidd 3) and when she woke up with a rose-petal stain on her panties she was “so proud of that flower and didn’t have a soul to show it to except Rosaleen”(13). Rosaleen is Lily’s housekeeper and one of her only friends. Lily’s curiosities about her mother lead her to the attic where she finds some of her mother’s belongings. Lily keeps everything she finds of her mother’s in a small tin buried in the orchards outside her house. This includes a photograph of her mother in front of an old car, a pair of white cotton gloves, and a small wooden picture of a black Mary with the words “Tiburon, S.C.” written on the back. She digs up this box when she is feeling lonely or sad which is very often while living under T. Ray’s…show more content…
She does not understand what the presence of a mother would really be like, but she feels her mother’s absence constantly. Though Lily fantasizes about a replacement mother in Rosaleen, she still yearns for the real thing. Lily eventually leaves Sylvan because T. Ray tells her that her mother left her as a child. Lily has kept her mother in such a high regard and the news from T. Ray is devastating to her, she will not believe it. Lily chooses to travels to Tiburon, South Carolina after reading the name of this city on the black Mary picture that belonged to her mother. “It made such perfect sense: my mother had been there. Or else she knew people there who’d cared enough to send her a nice picture of Jesus’ mother.” (Kidd 43) More importantly she is trying to find evidence that T. Ray is wrong and her mother did not leave her. It would be better to find out that she had accidentally killed her mother, for at least this fact would not diminish her perception of her mother’s love for
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