When looking at the parent or talking to them they seem to be apathetic to very depressed. They feel as if the only way to feeling anything is to make the child feel just as miserable as they are. In a lot of parents there seems to be a lot of drugs and alcohol use. They also behave in a bizarre manner. As in sudden out bursts or even lashing out on a child in public.
In today’s society, divorce has become a norm in our lives. Married couples today are getting a divorce due to many different reasons, either because of conflicts in the marriage, lost of romantic feelings, a spouse committing an affair, and other type of marriage problems. Most of these divorced couples have children that are very young and due to their age, have no idea on how to deal with an event like a divorce. These children will have to learn to deal with their parent’s divorce at such a young age, affecting them in a positive or negative way. The effects of recent enlargement in divorce rates are negative effects.
Divorce affects each member of the family which children experience it differently. Parents should sit down with their children and discuss the situation, but not going into detail, that would give mixed feelings towards the parent that is in fault. Even though parents are getting a divorce, they still are the most important people in a child’s life. Children tend to feel lonely, depressed, and rejected because of the situation. Children’s emotions, feelings, and how they cope with depends on how the parents display their coping skills (Lewis, 1999).
These effects can be long-lasting and extremely damaging. Divorce often results in many changes in children's living situations such as changing schools, child care, homes, etc. Children of divorced parents are more likely to use drugs and alcohol this is probably a misguided attempt to cope with the stress that often accompanies divorce and end up not having a good performance at school. There is an equivalents found between children of divorce and social skills. They have more difficulties trusting other people unconditionally and tend to have less social contacts.
Abstract Divorce is painful and confusing for children. How a parent handles it determines a lot about how the child will be affected, both today and tomorrow. After a parents’ divorce children are the primary concern. These concerns have derived from research evidence that divorce has many costs to them. Research reveals that balanced against the benefits that might derive from the end of a parents’ conflicted marriage, children often pay the price of a significantly reduced standard of living, emotional pain, and the loss of important parenting relationships in the immediate aftermath of divorce.
Romantic Problems – For some people, relationships and romantic entanglements may cause trauma in their life. Some people may thing they are not good enough for anybody because of a boy or girl they had feelings for, or they may also feel rejection. Traumatic Events – Sometimes a sudden death of a really close loved one, abuse, or any other traumatic events may have a real impact on them, making them become depressed or anxious. Separating or Divorcing parents – Divorced or separated parents are very common nowadays, though it affects a lot of children and leaves a mark in their life. Sometimes when parents’ divorce, kids may feel guilty and blame their selves for other things the rest of their lives.
Some kids feel betrayed by their separated parents. Miscommunication between parents and kids enters the relationship. They feel they have to take care of themselves, to put matter in their own hands. These effects damages kids, and most often Children whose parents have divorced are more and more the targets of abuse. These abuse often lead to low self-esteem and in some extreme cases
The behaviors whether verbal or nonverbal, cause a child to be mentally manipulated or bullied into believing a loving parent is the cause of all their problems, or the enemy to be feared, hated, disrespected and avoided. Hostile parenting deprives children of their right to be loved by, and showing love for both of their parents. It is a severe form of child abuse, which puts the children in fear of their own parent. The child living in such an abusive environment is taught hatred, which will affect them for the rest of their lives. Hostile Parenting destroys a loving relationship between a parent and a child, in a way that affects the child in all aspects of their life.
In a divorce situation most persons had a changed lifestyle and it can affect mainly young children and person now entering the adolescent stage. Divorce tends to intensify the child's dependence and it tends to accelerate the adolescent's independence; it often stimulates a more relapsing response in the child and a more violent response in the adolescent. For some persons, divorce shakes trust in dependency on parents who now behave in an extremely undependable way. They surgically divide the family unit into two different households between which the child must learn to transit back and forth, for a while creating unfamiliarity, instability, and insecurity, never being able to be with one parent without having to be apart from the other. As the functionalist state, the family is like an organism, containing different parts, each of which must work together for the well-being and equilibrium of the organism.
Divorce affects children both mentally and physically, and is also based on the child’s age, personality and gender. When a divorce occurs, parents tend to forget about the child and do not realize how much of a negative impact that it has on the child. This paper will provide a detailed description of the emotional and psychological effects of divorce on infants, preschool aged children, school aged children and adolescents. Also, their behavioral development and strategies to help children cope with divorce. Then we will see how divorce affects children spiritually.