Counselling Essay

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Question 2 a) Conditions of worth are stipulations other people put on us that we must fulfil in order to gain feelings of being valued by them. Conditions of worth are acquired over time and are put on individuals by people around us as well as society. Eg. A child may be told if they tidy their room they are ‘good’, the child will then try and be what their parents perception of good is in order to feel worthy of their parents. If we fulfil the conditions we gain ‘conditional positive regard’, this is when we feel worthy of another person/society but only if we have behaved in the way that they wanted us to. Also this can lead to ‘conditional positive self regard’, this is when we start to only value ourselves by the standards that others have put upon us. A lot of the time these standards are not possible for an individual to live up to and can lower our self esteem. Ida has taken on a lot of conditions of worth from both her parents and society. When she talks of becoming pregnant she says “nice girls wouldn’t have got themselves into this situation”. As this is what her parent have said to her she believes this to be true and has taken this belief on herself in order to feel worthy of her parents. Ida also speaks of her hatred for the moral welfare woman yet still changes her behaviour in order to please this woman. 250 words b) In order to establish an effective relationship the core conditions are essential. An individual who feels accepted are more likely to open up and talk freely, if they feel empathised with they will not feel alone and will feel understood and genuineness will make them feel more comfortable that someone is being completely honest and open with them. I think that being an effective listener is a very important part of establishing a relationship. Without the feeling of being important and listened to, at that

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