Complicated Grief Theory

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Mourning the death of a loved one is as universal a human emotion that exists; grief transcends across the life span and is an aspect of all cultures. This paper will briefly outline some theories of grief including stage and task theories. The perceived differences between complicated and uncomplicated grief will be highlighted. My own personal experience and belief systems around grief will be shared and the implications of these on my work with clients will be highlighted. Grief it would seem is the price we pay for our capacity to form attachments and love. Bayliss (2008:17) explains Attachment is linked to our need for security and safety. When loss of that attachment is threatened, or actually occurs, it causes distress. The greater…show more content…
I often felt my grief was rather complicated. However, after reviewing literature around complicated grief my experiences appear to have fallen within the realms of “normal” grief reactions. Payne, Horan & Relf (2010:76) state Complicated grief is conceptualised as, on the one hand, encompassing excessive intensity and prolonged duration and, on the other absence of reaction and short duration. Thus the need to grief may either be absent or delayed or chronic and fail to…show more content…
The therapeutic relationship between me as an emerging counsellor and a client who is grieving can only be healthy when I possess a keen level of awareness about my personal experiences with grief and loss. It is inevitable that I will face and experience more losses as I move through life as change and loss are part of the pattern of human existence. How these losses will impact on me I cannot answer for sure! While I am fortunate enough to know and understand many of the theories of grief and loss I firmly believe the essence of my work lies in my humanity. I cannot give meaning to a client’s grief, but I can facilitate the formation of a therapeutic relationship that enables a client to find the meaning for them. Frankel (2004:9) eloquently writes To live is to suffer; to survive is to find meaning in the suffering. If there is a purpose in life at all, there must be a purpose in suffering and in dying. But no man can tell another what his purpose is. Each must find out for himself. Reference and Bibliography 1. Bayliss, J. (2008) Counselling Skills in Palliative Care. UK: Quay
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