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A Feeling Essay

  • Submitted by: literally
  • on January 6, 2012
  • Category: Social Issues
  • Length: 574 words

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Below is an essay on "A Feeling" from Anti Essays, your source for research papers, essays, and term paper examples.

“I hate being bi…you don’t understand how much I hate it Jesus…”
This was inspired by my friend Heidi who was always there for me; I hope she’s doing fine.
As we grow up and discover ourselves we also learn to hate or love ourselves. You being attracted to the guy next door or to that boy in school aren’t so normal if you’re also a boy and if you’re attracted to both you’re confused thinking “what the hell is wrong with me?” I’ve known that I wasn’t completely straight for the past 4 years I'm now 17 and still can’t fully accept myself… I hate hiding myself and hate the fact that if I was straight my life would be so much easier. Personally, I know that if they ever found a way to reverse being gay I would jump on that opportunity faster than idk… something. And it’s not that I think there’s anything wrong with being gay it’s just that where I live and where I’m from and the culture that I’ve been raised in being straight is just easier. I had to live in the streets of downtown LA because I tried coming out to my mom. Like she said “te prefiero mil veces muerto que gay” which basically translates to “I’d rather you die a thousand times than for you to be gay.” Sure I have some LGBT friends and they’re great about supporting me and trying to tell me that there’s nothing   wrong but I know that deep down even they don’t wish to gay or lesbian. The façade they put in public of pride and idgaf what you think is just that— a façade. And how can they help me when they themselves need help with like everything… most of them can’t even live with their parents anymore because they just kept arguing and arguing. Most people would say that my take on this is depressing but this is the reality of where I live… I can’t have a bf because I think it’s weird and because it’s not fair to him for me to be hiding our relationship and with a girl it’s awkward because I’m like “I like guys I can’t be with her.”   I know that I going to have to learn to accept myself if I ever want...

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