I) Selfish pain
Believing that love is the first cause of pain is the first step that should be done in view of understanding ones reaction.
Possessiveness but also jealousy end up coming out of this feeling, and will alter your life. They have the faculty of making us loose our path, we wish to follow it but the feeling we felt so happy of controling ends up controling us.
We end up being more in love with the feeling then with the person itself, and forget that we are here for her good instead then just our self satisfaction.
Rage and envy would be two other negative aspects, as you desire something so hard. The feeling that was at first pure, turns out to be filled with the desire of getting more. The result is a growing disinteress into the person, with a growing into something/someone else.
II) External pain
We cant consider this pain being one’s fault and to not put the other into the question.
Pain, in its (love) moral aspect, is the result of a combination of two minds, who, when confronted one to the other creates inevitabily a shock, and a duel.
We might be ready to give up some of our ‘space’ and some of our ideas, but never will we accept to give up our own soul.
This is were the confrontation starts and where the pain starts. Small or big pain, whatever, the fact is that it is generated by this confrontation.
One might even fall in love with the pain he endures. Two results are then possible :
- a retreat which will make him even more suffer and get more and more bubbled
- an activation of an answering syndrome, that could cause one to feel like attacking the other, as he likes the feeling of being attacked hiself.
The main thing would be to not let those two main negative aspects have an direct influence on your life coz when they do pain is inevitable, for one or for the other.
Love can of course drive you mad, and direct you into a way you cant come back from.
One can controle better his reactions and feelings, but the...