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The Other Side of the Rainbow
Sophie Johnson is the neighborhood’s head mom and chief bitch. My entire middle school staff is in the habit of disappearing whenever she has an appointment and I even had a secretary once who called in sick on the days of Sophie’s scheduled visits. When I fired her she unrepentantly informed me that her job description didn’t include sucking up to a know-it-all, ex-Homecoming Queen with a Napoleon complex. Since I couldn’t argue with her logic, I wrote her a glowing recommendation but had to let her go just the same.
Sophie has a furious tick in her left eye when she gets angry that slows down or speeds up to match the level of her outrage – it’s a dead giveaway. Consequently, when I peeked through the blinds of my office window at her waiting position in the school lounge, her left eyelid was fluttering faster than fan blades. I saw her sitting tight-lipped and clutching a tube of green lipstick, the same shade I had seen smeared across her sixteen-year-old daughter’s face when she stepped off the bus yesterday morning. Stealing a quick look at my secretary, Grace, I saw that she was slouching down in her chair attempting to avoid any eye contact with the Queen bitch. I groaned inwardly turning around to face my desk. Shit.
On cue, my phone rang and when I answered it was Grace’s voice on the other end saying, “Mrs. Johnson is waiting to speak with you whenever you can spare a few minutes, Principal Bellock.”
“Tell her to go to hell.”
“I’ll let her know you’ll be ready in 5 minutes, Principal Bellock.” Grace’s voice even sounded cheery at the prospect of banishing Sophie from the lounge that doubled as her office.
“If you buy me 10 it should give me time to get out the window and around the parking lot to my car,” I said hanging up. Dammit.
Sophie typically comes in at least once a month to avenge some imagined wrong-doing at her daughter’s expense: Lindsey Sophia...